Finding a Way Out
Doing chores is one of the least favorite things for anybody. People who live alone really have no choice but to do their chores by themselves, however, people who live with someone such as a roommate have a little bit of an edge in the situation. There is a way in which you can get chores such as taking out trash, dishes, cooking, and laundry, to be done for you by your roommate. Lazy people not only want to put off doing chores by making excuses, being manipulative, and pretending they have physical problems. They will also stoop so low as to avoiding chores completely so their roommate has to do their dirty work.
The first step to avoid household chores is to make excuses involving your agenda, and things that have suddenly come up. For example, tell your roommate that you can not wash the dishes at the moment because you have to study for a midterm that will take place the following day. Your roommate will be understanding and wash the dishes for you. When your roommate tells you it is your turn to mow the lawn, be sure to set your pager alarm to go off in five minutes. The five minutes will give you time to get the lawn mower out, and to pretend you have been paged. Once your pager alarm has gone off, proceed to use the phone and pretend it is your work. When you get off the phone, your roommate will ask you whom it was, and you can tell her you need to go in to work right away. Tell her that you are sorry that you can not mow the lawn. Of course your roommate will think ?oh I might as well mow the lawn since the lawn mower is out already?.
When your excuses start becoming old, and you really do not want to do chores, the second step is to be manipulative. For instance, While your roommate is not busy, bring up the subject of dinner, and compliment on her cooking, and remind her of the time she made spaghetti and meatballs, and how good it was. Then she will show her appreciation, and offer to make it for you. Another way to manipulate her into doing a chore, like ironing, is to act like you do not know how to iron. When your roommate is around, act like you are trying to iron, and hold up a wrinkled shirt and say, ?how does this look??. Your roommate will say ?you don?t iron your clothes like that, let me help you out?. If that does not work, take an old shirt and burn it with an iron. She will definitely want to help you with your ironing so you do not ruin all your clothes.
You do not want to wear out the idea of being manipulative. So the third step to avoid household chores is to pretend you have physical problems that will get in the way of doing your chores. One possible physical problem can be that you have arthritis. You can use arthritis as an excuse to save yourself from washing dishes. For example, tell your roommate the arthritis in your hands is so bad that you must avoid any strenuous activity involving them and, therefore, you are not going to be able to wash the dishes. The excuse of arthritis can also be used to avoid taking out the trash. For instance, You can tell your roommate the same excuse as why you can not wash the dishes. Another physical problem you can use is that you have a bad back. When you start vacuuming remember to moan like you are in pain. Leave one hand on the vacuum cleaner and put the other hand on your lower back. Keep moaning in this position. Your roommate will then ask you if you are okay, and will offer to do the vacuuming. A third possible physical problem you can use is to say you are allergic to household cleaning supplies. For instance when your roommate yells ?it is your turn to mop the floor!?, agree to do so. Get out the cleaning materials and start to sneeze and cough. Be sure to be very dramatic. Throw open the windows, run to the bathroom, splash water on your face and scream that the fumes are burning your eyes. Then your roommate will end up mopping because the supplies are out.
You can not always use the same excuses to avoid chores, so the fourth and final step in avoiding your household chores is to get your roommate to do them for you by acting aloof, or avoiding them all together. Just avoid the chores till your roommate has no choice but to do them herself. If it is your duty to wash the dishes when it comes time to, just use paper plates and cups, and be sure to hide them. Your roommate will be forced to do the dishes so she will have something to eat on. If you have some laundry to do, it can be an easy task as long as you are sneaky about it. The only work that needs to be done involves taking your dirty clothes and put them in the washer. You don?t have to put any soap in or start the wash cycle. Sooner or later your roommate is going to have to use the washer, so she will start the wash cycle in order to wash her clothes. When the clothes are done she will then put them in the dryer, so she can put her clothes in the washer. Before you know it, your clothes will be washed, dried, and put in a basket in your room.