Every little kid has heroes. Most kids in my generation followed the ninja turtles, wrestlers, and other various sorts of characters. Not that I didn?t like them also, but my hero was quite different from all the usual common heroes. My biggest hero was Popeye, the Sailor Man. To me, Popeye was the ultimate. He always did the right thing no matter what. Popeye had a girlfriend, and he got to wear a really cool sailor suit. And with a can of spinach, he could take anyone on, and come out victorious. Anyway, I was pretty well obsessed with Popeye. My best friend, Joseph Lake was an awesome artist, even at age six, and he was always drawing Popeye pictures. He even taught me how to draw him. The two of us would play Popeye games in his room, where he had specialized Popeye equipment just for such purposes. I remember we built a fort out in his woods, and pretended it was Popeye?s boat. Even though it wasn?t in the water, it worked for us. I would watch the cartoons every day. One of my most favorites was a circus episode, where Popeye and Olive Oil had a job in the circus, but eventually the animals got out of control. Of course, Popeye had to bring things to order, beat up the animals, and turn them into luggage in one punch, which was my favorite Popeye trick.
One day, my teacher announced that we would be doing a school show. We would put on our very own parade, all first grade classes together, and everyone had to participate. There would be animals, clowns, jugglers, and puppets.
?But what about Popeye?? I asked.
“Umm… what about Popeye?” replied the teacher.
“Well how can you have a play without Popeye?? The teacher, quite perplexed about the whole argument, tried to reason with me. I kept quiet, but I wasn?t going to give up being Popeye. Back then, it was my understanding that we had a big problem: a teacher with a script set in stone and a first grade brat. When I went home after school that day, I was furious. I couldn?t take it that my hero wasn?t allowed in the play. I rambled off to my mom how Ms. Scott was unfair and mean. Mom told me if I cared so much, maybe I should write a letter to her explaining my thoughts. And that’s just what I did. In my best handwriting, and my mom next to me making sure I spelled the words right, I wrote the letter. I told her how the parade would be so much better if Popeye was present and expressed that I would be the best Popeye. My mom and I stamped the note and drove down to the post office. I remember the drive down to the post office. My mom was driving and just started to laugh at the situation. She told me she had never seen a kid so concerned about something. Utill this day she still says she has never seen me more concerned. Her laughter angered me and I didn?t talk to her on the ride back. I waited out the long weekend and was very anxious to see what Ms. Scott had to say. That weekend I practice my Popeye impersonation all over the house. I told mom to make me spinach thinking that if Popeye ate it and got strong, maybe I would. But when I took a bite, I didn?t eat anymore spinach.
Finally Monday arrived and I waited all day long to see if Ms. Scott said anything about the parade and Popeye. The day drew to a close and she said nothing. When we were dismissed, I was very confused. I kept wondering why she hadn?t mentioned it. I told my mom and she said she probably had not received the letter since we mailed it on a Saturday. So I waited another day and hoped she would get the letter. Again I stayed patient all day long, still she said nothing. Finally when we were in our reading groups, she called me over. She handed me the note and told me to read it to the class. Nervous and confused I read it out loud. Some kids laughed and others agreeded with the idea of Popeye. When I finished, Ms. Scott ask the class to vote to see if they thought it was a good idea or not. The whole class voted yes, but there was a problem. A couple of other people wanted to be Popeye now.
Luckily, Ms. Scott said I was going to be Popeye because it was my idea, which didn?t really settle with the class at first. But I was thrilled, my hero was going to be in the big first grade parade now. I remember getting home and telling the news to my mom and grandma. They both smiled and my mom couldn?t believe Ms. Scott let me be Popeye in the parade. I practiced my Popeye impersonation constantly. I wasn?t going to let this opportunity go to waste. Popeye was going to be walking around with the other characters. But every character was supposed to do a little introduction in the show. I was going to say who I was. All I had to say was ?I?m Popeye the sailor man.?
The night came of the parade finally arrived. All of the kids were dressed up and very lively. My mom had made bought an outfit and got me a fine sailor’s hat and a corn-cob pipe. We all pranced around to the music as our parents watched. The time came for me to say my line. I remember looking at the crowd and seeing everyone staring at me in anticipation. I froze and totally went blank. I couldn?t even remember my hero?s line. I burst out in tears and ran off the stage. All the concern and thinking about being Popeye, and I didn?t even do my part. My parents went backstage and calmed me down. They took me out for pizza afterwards and everything was happy again.
I look back and laugh at it now. I took all the time to be Popeye in the show, and practiced so much to be the perfect Popeye, but when the time came I couldn?t do it. It was horrible then, but an unforgettable memory now.